situaaaation

So i just had a meeting with some pretty important legal people. Basically, they asked me a bunch of questions about john. They even taped the interview (i was also being watched through a one way mirror) and put it on a dvd. I found out after the whole interview that john had put twenty girls through the same thing ( even one boy). And that’s just in state. And he decided to make a facebook page using my first name and pictures of me to lure in those other girls. And i thought i knew everything there was to know about this situation…

so wait,he’s a what???

“John” is a cyber predator.
Okay… what the fuck does that mean?
A cyber predator is an adult (18 or older) who uses the internet to take advantage of children or teens, usually sexually. It sounds scary, right? Well, that’s because it is.

to everyone who wants to know what the hell i’m talking about

I may look like a normal girl when you see me walking the halls at school. But if you really knew me, you would know i’m anything but normal.
Two or three years ago, i met an amazing guy on the internet. That right away should have been a red flag, but i chose to ignore it.
Let’s call this guy John. John knew the exact right thing to say whenever i had a bad day or anything went wrong at home. He was the sweetest guy ever, and in a matter of months, i had fallen head over heels for him.
I thought everything was perfect between us. I trusted him. So when he asked me to send him naked pictures of myself, i thought nothing of it.
But then his requests turned to demands and pictures turned to videos. I knew this was wrong, but i thought i could change john.
One day, though, john told me he had bad news; he had just come home from the doctor and he found out he had cancer. I was devastated; i cried for hours. I considered breaking up with john, but i figured he needed my support, and i did love him after all.
As it turned out, though, john didn’t have cancer. His name wasn’t even john.
I was watching the news at my grandmother’s house over the summer when a picture of john came onto the screen. They had a whole story about him and how he had raped a girl, and how police had found several pictures and videos of dozens of underaged girls on his computer.
I was shocked. By this point, i had broken up with john about six months before he got caught. So i thought i was in the clear.
I was wrong.
here i am now, almost a year after his arrest, being served with a subpoena to go to court, being pulled out of class to go talk to the assistant district attorney over the phone, watching my mother cry because of what i “did to the family.”
My life is torture right now.
and really, the torture is just beginning.

The trial hasn’t even started yet.

My Letter To You

Dear You,

I thought I loved you. You made me feel beautiful, made me feel like I mattered, when nothing else in my life was going right. I shared my deepest, most personal secrets with you, but you ended up using them all against me.

But that’s just what you do, isn’t it? You make a girl feel close to you, like she can trust you. Then you go and rip all of that trust out from under her. Compliments turn to threats. Sweet promises turn into nasty blackmail. “This is my gift to you” turns into ” You owe me.”

What happened? I stopped giving you what you wanted when I realized the truth of your ways. But you didn’t like that, did you? So what did you do to get back at me?

You made my life a living hell.

Thanks for that,

Love,

Me.